Blame Chemistry
by Springleigh
Summary: Sometimes life doesn't have a happy ending. TBC
1. Chapter 1

This isn't going to have a happy-happy-cheery theme. I don't know if it'll end happy or not. I'm going with the flow for now. I can tell you these three things:

- It's before we got any cutesy moments with the Bug guy and tall brunette

- You'll have to read to find out the pairing.

- Listen to sad music when you read some of the chapters. It seriously adds to the story. ie. Celine Dion, Augustana, George Strait etc.

Happy reading

YellowDisease

Oh yeah, and some mildly bad language in this.

Blame Chemistry  
Chapter 1

Dip. Dust. Dip. Dust. Nothing. Sara Sidle sighed. Passion turned to bore for the level three CSI, and she didn't exactly have the nerve to admit who she thought was the cause. Dip. Dust. Dip. Dust. "Yes! Finally." Sara growled in past frustration. "Ha-ha-ha. Eat that one you murdering son-of-a-bitch." Not knowing who was standing in front of her, she stood up quickly, subsequently throwing a jar of power in the air. "Oh shit."

Grissom covered his mouth trying to keep the evil little crystals from getting up his nose, while Sara mumbled unsuitable things out loud.

"Err. Mother Fucker. Fucking asbestos infested damn mother effing print powder!" _Good Job Sparky. Embarrass yourself in front of him again. I give that two thum..  
_  
"I'm sorry. This is a bad time. I'll come back later." Grissom turned on his heel and walked away briskly. Like he wouldn't make a fool out of himself if he asked her. Sure, he wanted to, but…

"Grissom, no. Wait." Sara scurried to catch up to him. "Damn you walk fast."

He looked constipated. Mouth closed in a straight line, hands in his pockets, and walking fast to God knows where. "Yeah, well-"

"Well slow down!" She growled. They walked for a few minutes before she asked, "What did you want?"

Grissom began to answer. "Well I was just going to…well-"

_Jeesuss. This is stupid. He wont say what he wants. He never does.  
_  
"Grissom. Just spit it out please. I have work to do." She said matter-of-factly.

He said nothing.

"Or don't say anything at all. That's fine. I'll see you later." Sara shook her head, turned and walked back the crime scene.

Grissom's head shot up and he turned to see Sara walking away. Had he been listening to her at all? "Have dinner with me!"

Sara stopped dead in her tracks. "Excuse me?"

"Will you have dinner with me?" He repeated.

She laughed. "That print powder must be affecting your brain. You might want to go visit a doctor." Sara shook her head and laughed, not because it was funny, but because it was happening again. He was toying with her. Only this time, it was probably her fault. She threw the powder. Then again, he was the one who snuck up on her while she was working.

"It's not the powder. And if it is, thank God it's given me the courage to ask you." Grissom replied honestly. "So I'll ask you again. Will you have dinner with me?"

"You're serious. Okay. Sure. When and where?" She asked, still not quite believing what was going on. _Act cool, Sidle. Breathe. In. Out. In. Out. That's better.  
_  
Grissom pondered for a moment. "Well, I know this great Thai Restaurant on Sahara Avenue if you want to go there."

_Oh my God. Does he know I love that place? One of the only vegetarian restaurants in Vegas. Chill Sidle. He probably looked it up on the internet._ "That or he's a stalker." She whispered out loud, not knowing she was doing so.

"What?"

Sara's head shot up. "Nothing. That's fine. What time?"

"How's eight tomorrow night? I'll pick you up?" He asked.

_Not a good idea_, Sara thought. She would need an easy way out it things didn't go well. "No. I'll meet you there."

"Oh alright."

They stood there for a while longer before Sara broke the silence. "Well, I have work to do, so I'll see you tomorrow night."

She walked away feeling higher than she ever had. Five years, eight months and nine days after she moved to Vegas did he finally ask her to dinner. And yes, she had been counting.

_Congratulations, Sidle. You finally have him. _Sara smiled at the thought, until another thought ran into mind. _Or do you?_

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A/N: Can I get an encore on how gosh darn boring that first chapter was? Can I just tell you all how much I hate starting stories because it means I have to think. And that's something that doesn't come naturally. Trust me, this will be sad. And I'm pumped to see how this turns out. I don't expect any reviews. But what a frickin treat it would be to get a few.


	2. Chapter 2

First off, I'd like to specially thank: rsx702o9, VegaDreamer, CSIrockz and grissomlove. Thanks for sticking with this and reviewing. It meant a lot.

I'm suprised I'm actually getting a chapter in this week. Finals at school all week, it's sucking the life out of me and it's only the second day.

Anywho. This chapter is just getting to the point of what the story will be baised on. I don't like it. I don't expect anyone to be happy about it either. But like CSIrockz said: It's hard to find a sad story that doesn't end in "Happily ever after."

As of now, I have no idea if this will have a happy ending. But who knows, if not, some cute scenes will definetly be in it.

"Well she wants to live her life  
Then she thinks about her life  
Pulls her hair back, as she screams  
"I don't really wanna live this life"

She only drinks coffee at midnight  
When the moment is not right  
Her timing is quite, unusual  
You see her confidence is tragic, but her  
Intuition magic And the shape of her body?  
Unusual"  
- Meet Virginia - Train

I don't believe in beta, for I believe my mistakes are my battlefield scars.

* * *

Chapter 2

Sara didn't want to think of it as a date. Not yet anyway. Gil Grissom was an unpredictable man, and she didn't want to get her hopes up. Who knew, maybe it was for a promotion, or perhaps a private co-worker to co-worker meeting.  
'_Get real, Sidle. You know that would never happen. How many times has he threw the line in for you only to drop you back in the water? Like you said, he's heartless.'_

"I didn't say that." Sara snapped. How silly of her to be listening to the voice inside her head. '_Same thing.'_ "Shut up!"

Racing to the end of the room, she quickly switched on the radio in high hopes the voices inside her head would sooner fade than later.

Thinking about what she should wear would make the voices disappear for sure; and she would need to find something special. Something only he could see her in, something he would drool over, something…. "Forget the drool part. Something casual." And so began the hunt for a casual, non-drooling, comfortable outfit for a not-quite-date-yet outfit.

First she pulled out a cream colored suit combined with a darker brown undershirt. Her most comfortable suit, but certainly not the most casual outfit. "Next."

Sara pulled out a light brown skirt that flowed down to her knees, along with a sea green spaghetti strapped top. Cute. "Too dressy. And what's with all the damn brown?"

Endless amounts of clothing products were skewed all around her bedroom, and Sara didn't notice it one bit. She was on a time crunch, and as of now she had, "One hour, three minutes and twenty eight seconds" before she would have to venture out to her not-quite- well, you get it.

"Twenty seven."

At last she came upon the ideal attire for this _'meeting', 'promotion',_ or whatever it was. Eager to get the rest of her business done, she scurried to the bathroom to continue her routine.

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When Sara exited the bathroom, a sense of loneliness rippled through her body. Never in her life had she experienced someone telling her how beautiful she was, how wonderful she looked, and she feared no one ever would.

Shaking the ghastly thought from her mind, Sara looked at her appearance in the mirror silently rating herself a six out of a ten scale. She had chosen flared denim jeans and a deep, flowing, red blouse that made her profound eyes stand out more than ever before. Anyone who was anyone would have thought she was the most beautiful creature alive.

Refusing to wallow in self-pity any longer, Sara went to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee. One sugar, one teaspoon of instant coffee and a load of creamer. It would either put the edge on or take it off. She prayed for the latter.

Sara had wasted just enough time drinking her coffee, that when she was done, it was time for her to head out. "Here goes nothing." She sighed, heading towards her keys.

She grabbed her keys from the counter, hopped into her vehicle, not knowing what to feel at this point, and headed towards Sahara Avenue.

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"Oh Jesus God." Grissom muttered to himself when he saw the beauty standing before him.

"Excuse me?" Sara asked, slightly blushing.

Shaking his head from the dirty thoughts that were seeping through his brain, he motioned for her to take a seat across from him. "How are you?"

Sara pondered on what to say. '_Geez, it's not like your on Million Dollar Password. Say something already!_' "Better now that I'm out of that small cooped up apartment."

Sure she wasn't on Million Dollar Password, but that reply gave her a million dollar smile. _'Eh, I give that a half million, no make that a quarter million. That smile was cheep shit, Sidle, and you know it. He's given you better on-'_ Sara let out a slight growl.

"You alright?" Grissom asked.

"Yeah, fine." She answered swiftly, craving a new conversation. "So um.. Why are we here?"

Sara was slightly confused when she saw another plate at the table seated beside Grissom, but she put it in the back of her mind. _'It's nothing_,' she thought, '_The waitress must have gotten the place setting wron..'_

"Well…." Grissom started, but before he could finish, a long haired brunette approached the table, and bent down to kiss him. Sara panicked.

"Sara, there's someone I would like you to meet." Grissom wasn't smiling per se, it was more of a nervous grin, and that made something settle uneasily in Sara's stomach. "This is Deborah, my fiancé."

* * *

A/N: Holy crap. Did I just say he had a fiance? Oh dear God what have I done? Dimé. Tell me. I'd love some reviews but it's alright if y'all don't want to. I can give you a hint about the future chapters if you review. And if you ask in the review. :) Toodles.


	3. Chapter 3

Thanks for reviewing all of you who did. Happy scenes will arrive soon I promise.

Hate Me - Blue October

REVIEW. REVIEW.

Chapter 3

* * *

The scent of fresh cologne filled Sara's nose as she leaned into the comforting arms of the man who presently shared her bed. '_I wonder what it would feel like to wake up like this everyday.'_ She thought, sinking deeper into the mans embrace. A hand was resting on the curve of her hip, and the sound of snoring was the only thing heard; until the man spoke.

"I love em you." A soft snort escaped his lips, while the hand on her hip began pulling her closer. Sara smiled at his words, but as he spoke the last word, "Debbie", the events of the previous night flooded her mind.

CSICSICSICSICSICSI

Sara sat horror-struck and broken as the man whom she had fallen in love with had just informed her about this secret life he had been living. "F-f-fiancé?" She quivered, fiddling with her elastic band that sat on her wrist.

Grissom said nothing, but the shorter brunette smiled and reached her hand over to Sara, who reluctantly shook it. When she pulled back, Sara frantically wiped her hands on her napkin several times. _'As if wiping your hands is going to make her go away. Brilliant one, Sidle.'_

"It's nice meeting you Miss Sidle. I've heard a lot about you." Deborah leaned over to Sara and added, "Don't worry about the DUI honey, if it took Gil that much to realize something was wrong, he's to blame." Deborah chuckled. "I'll be right back. Need to use the ladies room." She got up an kiss Gil on the cheek before walking towards the back.

As soon as Deborah was out of sight, Sara stood up slowly, walked over to Grissom and stayed standing as he looked up at her. _'Right where I want him._' Sara was pissed.

"Sara?" Grissom winced as her hand came in contact with his cheek with a loud "_Slap_!".

"You bastard!" she screamed in a whisper. "Are you seriously telling me you are getting married? To that!" She pointed in the direction of the bathroom. "And all that time I thought you at least _respected_ me God damn it!" Sara turned around to leave.

"Sara, I think you forgot something." Grissom asked wearily, reaching over to grab something from her side of the table.  
Sara stormed back over to him and kicked him in the shin as she yelled, "I hope your balls get diseased and fall off you-you-you asshole monkey!"

Grissom cringed as his hand gripped the elastic she had left behind tightly.

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She was crying. She didn't realize it until she was far away from the asshole monkey, and exceedingly close to the mini bar. _'Walk away, Sidle. You'll just end up hurting yourself mo-_' "Can I get something very strong?"

The bar tender replied, "Sure, we have various-"

"I mean the strongest of strong you have." She nodded rapidly.

"Sure, ma'am, how about-"

"Like men-on-steroids strong." Sara spoke over him once again, looking at the various assortment of drinks.  
The man opened his mouth to speak, but made sure Sara had nothing more to say before simply saying, "Here," and handing her a very strong drink.

Sara gulped the drink down swiftly, and called the Bar Tender back for another drink. This process continued for another twenty minutes before an older looking man came to the rescue.

"Heyyy pardener." Sara lifted two fingers to her head and saluted the stranger as if they had been friends for years. "You should taste this, is delis-delis-good."

The man smiled and cautiously took the drink away from her. "I think you've had enough pumpkin."

"Nuh nuh. Gimmie it back." Sara reached over him for the drink.

"What's your name?" The man asked.

Sara seemed to be thinking. "Sara Sidle."

Trying to continue conversation, he asked, "My name's Antony Willis." Silence. "What do you do for a living?"

"I work in a Crime Lab." She replied bluntly.

He chuckled, "And you're allowed to drink?"

"I-I'm a criminalist, Arthur, nottda prisner. I ken have a life ya know." She was getting cranky. _'Go home, Sara._' "I am damn it. Shut up."

"Who are you talking to?"

Sara stood up. "It's was nice to meets you, Avery. Nights."

He watched her walk out of the building, but something inside of him kicked in, and he hit the ground running for her. "Wait!"  
Sara didn't turn around. "Go away."

"You can't drive home like that." He ignored her command. "I wont have you die because of me."

Sara mumbled quietly, "Trusts me, it wouldns be youris fauld." She tumbled to her vehicle and slipped inside.

"Just let me drive you home. Then….then I can take a cab home and leave you to your business." Antony pleaded. "Please."

"Whadda hell. 'Ine."

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She panicked. "Get-" Grunt "Off of" Another grunt, "Me!" Sara pushed the man off of the bed.  
"Jesus Christ woman!" Antony grunted and pulled a sheet to cover himself.

"What are you doing here?!" She demanded. "I never invited you into my bed you creep!"

A smile came to his face, "Oh pumpkin, I blissfully remember you saying you wanted nothing more."

"I could have you arrested for statutory rape!" She screeched, pointing to the door, "Now get our scrawny, Debbie-loving ass out of my fucking apartment NOW!"

"Awe, pumpkin.."

"Don't you ever call me that again! OUT!"

He grabbed his clothes and headed for the door. Sara heard him mumble under his breath, "Bitch."

* * *

A/N: TBC of course. I have no comment for this chapter. Review if you have any questions. 3


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N**: Sorry I haven't updated this in a while. Re-read it to catch up on the other chapters.

**Chapter 4**

Sara sat in front of her window looking out at the gray sky. She thought about earlier that day and wondered how the hell she allowed a stranger in to her bed. Though filing a report against the creep sounded tempting, she thought against it. It was her fault anyway. If she hadn't gotten drunk, the man never would have offered her a ride home, and she never would have woken up with him in her bed. But then Sara thought back even further. It wasn't her fault. It was Grissom's. He was the one who decided to be the jerk who invited her to dinner just to tell her about his fiancee'. Can you believe it?! **Fiancee'!** Thinking about the previous night, she compared herself to the gray clouds outside. Bitter, cold and unloved.

A knock at the door interrupted her thoughts. Sara took another quick chug of her coffee and headed for the door. "Who is it?" she called from the living room.

No answer.

She opened the door to find a bouquet of roses lying on the ground below her feet. A message read, "I'm sorry."

Sara held the flowers to her chest and the only logical idea that came to her mind was Grissom. She tossed the flowers in the garbage along with her hang-over vomit and rotton banana.

-------------------------------------------

Short. Sorry. I just thought to update tonight. Remind me to upate tomorrow and I will. I'm exhausted. :)

Review? :)


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N**: Thank you for the reviews. :o) About my username: I change it so often it's crazy. Usually I make it about my current favorite couple/actor on a show.

This chapter is still a little short. I'm trying to get back into writing CSI fics since I've bee usually writing GL ones. From watching soaps I have a first hand look at romance so hopefully after the angst in this story fade (if it does), I can add some sweet romance into it!

Enjoy.

**Chapter 5**

Sara was just about to take a shower when there was another knock at the door. She mumbled to herself and wanted to ignore it, but curiousity got the best of her and she made her way to the door. When she opened it, she secretly wished she had ignored it. "What do you want Grissom." she said bluntly, opening the door to allow him in.

He didn't budge. Nervously he spoke, "I wanted to talk to you."

Sara plopped down on the couch waited for him to continue.

"Uh." Silence followed.

"Look, you can either come in and talk to me or you can continue being a mute and go away. I don't have time for your stupid games. I have things to do." Sara snapped.

Grissom was taken aback. He stepped forward and closed the door. "I'm sorry if last night made you angry I-"

"Oh, I'm not angry. I'm more angry at myself actually." she said. Sara shifted herself on the couch. "But I'm not angry at you. Hell, I'm not even surprised. You're _Grissom_. I expected no less."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Sara stood up and began wandering around her confined apartment. "Well......you're the only man that would take a woman to dinner just to introduce her to his _**fiancee**_..."

She made her way to the small bookshelf, where her eyes immediately found the Entomology book he'd given her a few years ago. She let her finger trace the edges before slowly turning around.

Grissom looked at her with a softness that took Sara's breath away. Sadly, she wasn't shocked at his following words, "I'll see you at work tonight."

She refused to let herself cry. He was only a man. And all men are jerks.

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Thanks for reading.

I know it was short still. And maybe a poorly written chapter. I haven't really watched or cared for CSI lately. I'll try to watch a few re-runs and maybe it'll give me more ideas.

I'll try to update this week. :)

Pst. Review.. ;)


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